In a shocking turn of events, scientists have discovered that buying iPads and Bluetooth speakers on Memorial Day can cure the existential dread of being alive. As part of the "15 Best Memorial Day Tech Deals of 2025," retailers are offering these gadgets at such ridiculously low prices that people are starting to question the value of life itself. The iPads, which now come with a complimentary existential crisis, are available for the low price of a few hundred dollars. Meanwhile, the Bluetooth speakers are so powerful they can drown out the sound of your soul screaming from the void.

In related news, therapists have reported a surge in clients seeking help for their newfound addiction to impulse buying tech gadgets on holidays. As one therapist noted, "It's like they're trying to fill the void in their lives with stuff." When asked about the trend, a spokesperson for the tech industry simply shrugged and said, "Hey, at least they're distracted."