In a shocking turn of events, the Denver Nuggets have parted ways with coach Michael Malone and general manager Calvin Booth due to a "cold war" that involved them competing in a series of heated staring contests and who could eat the most free nachos in the arena's cafeteria. Sources close to the team report that Malone's refusal to play young players, such as Jalen Pickett, in favor of Russell Westbrook was the final straw in this epic battle of wills. Apparently, Booth had drafted Pickett specifically to counter Malone's nacho-eating abilities, but it was too little, too late.

As tensions escalated, the team's defense began to resemble a kindergarten playground, with players arguing over who got to be "it" during tag breaks. In the end, the Nuggets decided both Malone and Booth had to go, as neither could out-nacho the other. David Adelman, the new interim coach, has vowed to resolve the nacho crisis and bring harmony back to the team. Meanwhile, Nikola Jokić remains optimistic, saying, "Even without our coach and GM, we can still manage to lose games spectacularly."