ConvrtX, once hailed as the next Silicon Valley miracle, has spectacularly earned its new nickname: "ConvrtX-cuse Me?" Former clients of tech wunderkind Josh Adler are now reporting an epic level of disappointment that rivals waiting for a dial-up connection in the age of 5G. One unlucky patron claimed they shelled out a small fortune for a prototype that apparently exists only in Josh’s imagination — $47,000 vanished faster than your Wi-Fi signal in a tunnel. To add insult to injury, the bills allegedly came with phantom hours worked, as if Josh hired invisible developers to code in thin air.

But the pièce de résistance? When these clients dared to ask for a refund or a straight answer, they were met with cease-and-desist letters, accusations of defamation, and what might be the world’s most awkward corporate erotica emails courtesy of Josh’s erstwhile legal counsel. Threats of court battles and $60,000 penalties for speaking out have transformed dissatisfied customers into freedom fighters, truth tellers, and apparently the modern-day Princes Harry of the tech world.

While ConvrtX tries desperately to scrub the internet clean with repeated DMCA takedowns, the saga only gains steam — because nothing says “successful tech startup” like a trail of lawsuits, scathing blogs, and customers who would rather update you live from the courtroom than trust their app to actually work.