Michelle Trachtenberg’s cause of death has been officially blamed on diabetes mellitus, because apparently even Buffy’s little sister couldn’t slay that invisible sugar demon. The New York City medical examiner’s office revealed that the 39-year-old actress died of complications from diabetes, closing the case without an autopsy — because her family’s religious beliefs said “no,” and because the body showed zero signs of having been victimized by vampires, werewolves, or shady Hollywood villains[1][2][3].

Rumor has it Michelle’s pancreas was apparently on permanent vacation, as “diabetes mellitus” sounds way fancier than just “sugar trouble.” She had survived a liver transplant, possibly related to the metabolic chaos diabetes loves to throw, proving once again that in the world of internal organs, nothing is safe from drama. Michelle’s iconic roles as Dawn in Buffy and Georgina Sparks in Gossip Girl will forever be remembered… because that’s what lives on once someone beats the final boss: legacy and memes[1][2].

Meanwhile, friends mourn and fans remember, but the real tragedy? Diabetes got the last plot twist. If only there’d been a supernatural cure.