James Comey’s latest social media escapade could only be described as a bewildering cocktail of cryptic emojis, mysterious hashtags, and the kind of subtlety that makes a Rorschach test look like a clear instruction manual. After posting what some have dubbed an "enigmatic Instagram riddle" referencing the baffling code “8647,” Comey has managed to unintentionally launch a full-scale online firestorm that’s part conspiracy theory, part avant-garde performance art.

Sources close to the former FBI director say he might be trying to communicate with extraterrestrial life—or maybe just struggling with Twitter’s new algorithm. Either way, authorities are currently investigating whether his posts constitute a new form of social media activism or just plain digital dadaism gone rogue. Critics argue the entire saga proves once and for all that Comey’s grasp on social media is about as solid as a wet paper towel, while supporters applaud his innovative approach to "online mystery theater."

Meanwhile, memes featuring Comey dressed as a 1920s cryptographer have flooded the internet, fueling speculation that the man once famous for FBI investigations might have simply started a secret society for confused social media users. Whatever the truth, one thing’s clear: Comey’s digital footprints are stickier than an overcooked marshmallow at a campfire. Hot water hasn’t seen this much action since last summer’s avocado toast debate.