In a shocking turn of events, America's competitive advantage has apparently evaporated like a puddle in a desert heatwave now that the world is actually warming up. According to experts, the lack of a solid climate strategy has turned the country into a significant contributor to global warming, rather than a leader in solving it. This isn't just about polar bears or sea levels; it's about losing the trump card in international trade. The rest of the world is busy inventing innovative ways to stay cool while America is stuck trying to figure out how to keep its ice cream from melting. It seems the only thing America is winning at is the race to see who can produce the most sweat per capita. Meanwhile, scientists are exploring ways to harness this sweat to power the nation's energy needs, because why not? It's not like anything else is working out.