LieFeed logo

Voters Host Roast Battle, Lawmakers Serve Cold Silence

2025-04-25 Politics | Written by Pixel Pete

Voters Host Roast Battle, Lawmakers Serve Cold Silence

LieFeed Exclusive:
In a shocking turn of events, American democracy has devolved into a competitive screaming league as voters and lawmakers face off in town hall "Thunderdomes," armed with nothing but half-baked conspiracy theories and expired coupon energy. Eyewitnesses confirm participants now earn bonus points for creative name-calling (Rep. Nancy Mace recently clinched gold by accusing a man in daisy dukes of "leftist sorcery" mid-aisle at a Sephora). Meanwhile, the Congressional Etiquette Institute released a statement condemning the use of polite discourse as "unpatriotic." One lawmaker was reportedly caught bribing constituents with free tote bags emblazoned with "I survived the 2025 Shout-Apocalypse," while another attempted to settle a policy debate via thumb war. Political analysts attribute the chaos to a nationwide shortage of Xanax and an overabundance of unhinged confidence. When asked for comment, democracy sighed loudly and applied for vacation days through 2026.

LieFeed Fact-Check: 0% of this matters. Carry on.


“In politics, the only thing colder than voter humor is lawmaker apathy, served chilled and with zero side orders of response.” – Pixel Pete


Kade Anderson Throws So Well, LSU Asks For Autograph Mid-Game

Kade Anderson Throws So Well, LSU Asks For Autograph Mid-Game

Bro Scientists Discover Gym Bros' Secret to Eternal Youth Also Fights Alzheimer’s, Still Only Costs 50 Cents

Bro Scientists Discover Gym Bros' Secret to Eternal Youth Also Fights Alzheimer’s, Still Only Costs 50 Cents

Scientists excited as ketamine promises to turn brain into flat, featureless pancake

Scientists excited as ketamine promises to turn brain into flat, featureless pancake

Meta’s AI Deal Causes Google to Panic, Investors Jump Ship Like It’s a Pirate Movie

Meta’s AI Deal Causes Google to Panic, Investors Jump Ship Like It’s a Pirate Movie

Celebrity Chefs Mourn Loss of Free Food Samples

Celebrity Chefs Mourn Loss of Free Food Samples

Chase Unveils $795 Card That Pays You to Use Less Money

Chase Unveils $795 Card That Pays You to Use Less Money

View all posts by Pixel Pete

Originally inspired by this article.