Move over, Cy Young—you’ve got competition! LSU’s Kade Anderson, apparently moonlighting as the “best pitcher on the planet,” threw a historic masterpiece that left Coastal Carolina wondering if baseballs had suddenly turned into invisible ninjas. With 130 pitches and a complete-game shutout, Anderson didn’t just strike out 10 batters; he struck out the very concept of offense itself.

Fans and coaches alike are already predicting the Washington Nationals will draft him first overall, despite his casual attitude that basically screams “Don’t worry, I got this” even when he’s accidentally hitting batters and handing out free passes like candy.

LSU is now just one win away from snagging their eighth national title, riding Anderson’s arm like it's a golden ticket to baseball immortality. Meanwhile, Coastal Carolina’s 26-game winning streak ended faster than you can say “pitch count,” proving once again that in baseball, miracles are served best with a side of absolute dominance and a sprinkle of absurdity.

Stay tuned for Game 2, where Kade Anderson might just decide to throw with his eyes closed—or maybe juggle baseballs—because apparently, being “the best pitcher on the planet” means never breaking a sweat.