In a shocking turn of events, the fractured relationship between OpenAI and Microsoft has reached new heights of drama. Sources close to the situation reveal that OpenAI executives have been secretly consulting with a team of therapists to help them work through their feelings about Microsoft's alleged "clutching" behavior regarding their intellectual property. Meanwhile, Microsoft has reportedly hired a team of feng shui experts to rearrange their office furniture, hoping it will improve their AI coding tool's karma and ward off any impending Windsurf IP curses.

As tensions escalate, rumors are circulating that OpenAI is planning to release a new AI model trained exclusively on breakup songs to cope with the heartbreak. Microsoft, not to be outdone, has announced plans to develop an AI-powered couples therapy chatbot to mend the rift. It seems the future of AI is not just about innovation but also about navigating the complexities of a tech romance.