The IMF has officially declared that the world is not careening into recession, despite Donald Trump's tireless efforts to give global trade tariffs a new “make tariffs great again” makeover. Apparently, the economy is just shrugging off the tariff tantrums like a toddler ignoring a broccoli plate. Global growth is chugging along at a solid 3.3 percent, which is basically the economic equivalent of your grandfather’s slightly creaky but still functional lawn mower[1][2].

Experts are baffled, claiming the global economy's resilience looks suspiciously like it’s powered by sheer stubbornness or maybe just a good Wi-Fi connection. While some feared Trump's tariffs would turn international commerce into a dumpster fire, it seems the only thing getting burned was a few spreadsheets somewhere in Geneva. Instead, inflation is doing its slow dance off the charts, and growth forecasts remain steady-ish—because nothing says “worldwide financial health” like a “slow but steady” increase nobody can quite get excited about[2].

So rest easy, the global economy is still standing, wobbling like a toddler on a tricycle, but somehow refusing to faceplant. Take that, tariffs.